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UTS Hockey Club 2001
Novelty Awards
First Aid Award
Nominations:
Damien Deefholts - breaking ankle whilst running
out to umpire
Bruce Sutton - knee ligaments, whilst dancing
drunk, tried to lift Reita above his head. Also
pulled quad muscles after return from knee injury
Mel Howie - broken toe after friend drove over
it
James Telfer - shattered collarbone after being
cut in half by Glebe prick, proceeded to collapse
in shock on the sideline.
Fiona Budd - knee exploded, premature end to hockey
career. Got to wear a very impressive knee brace,
though
Matt Pine - ankle exploded, entire lower leg went
black from bruising.
Sonny Chadha - knocked out own teeth whilst fart-arsing
around at training - save the cricket shots for
summer, Sonny
Germany - name 1 week when all the Germans took
the field?
Paul Kelly - his pulled groin has yet to heal
- he should leave it alone and give it some rest!
Greg Doolan - Another broken hand, whilst taking
the field for 2 minutes during a 3rd grade game.
Andrew Eagleton - copped a serious blow in the
genital area from a hockey stick, so much so that
he had carried off the field and could not return
for the duration of the match. What made it extra
painful? It was also his birthday and you could
tell that the magic glint in his eye disappeared
as the likelihood of birthday sex was suddenly
made impossible.
Winner: Andrew Eagleton
Woosie Milk Scull
Nominations:
Jason Selby - receiving yellow card for telling
the umpire "don't point at me".
Justin Nelson - leaving ALL his hockey gear at
home for the last game of the season.
Brendan Garard - after a wild 1st year with the
club in 2000, party-man Biff was missing-in-action
and under the thumb in 2001, coming out with the
boys on only 2 occasions, drinking Hahn Lights
for the short duration of his stay.
Mens 2nd Grade - never collecting balls after
pre-game warm-up, 6 dozen balls missing, presumed
lost.
Winner: Biff
Dummy Spit
Nominations:
Ian Litchfield - consistency during year, 6 yellow
cards can't be wrong
Adele Cotton and Gin Peadon - after losing semi
final, sticks and goalie gear reached the dugout
well before they did.
Chris Garbe - played just 4 games but had umpires
scurrying for their English-German dictionaries
to find out what he was calling them
Megan Taylor - not happy with too many corner
variations
Damien Deefholts - also unhappy during games whenever
a corner variation did not involve him, and also
whenever he failed to win a free hit with one
of his trademark dives "Wot?!? No Way!"
Paul Kelly - a few sticks thrown this year, one
into the Child Care centre at Ryde. Plus his own
"Wot?!? No Way!" which earned a yellow
card in Round 1 vs Ryde.
Steve Gellatly - that fiery Scottish blood finally
rushed to Stevie's head when he encouraged the
umpire to give him a red card "Go on you
arsehole, give me a red card then" he said,
as walked from the field - for 4 weeks.
Winner: Steve Gellatly
Golden Spade
Nominations:
Rob McGrory - trying to pick-up some young chicks
in Albury, was rejected with a "Get lost,
old man" call from across the street.
Phil Taylor - The Goat was always out there trying,
with in depth questions on uni, career plans,
and life in general. And who could ever forget
his pick-up line from last year's Uni Games -
"Hi, they call me the Goat - I eat anything".
The Sharkies - a team coached by "Sailor
Boy" Nathan Gilbert. After meeting their
coach for the first time, the entire team arrived
at the next training decked out in tight singlets
and skimpy shorts. You could hear their "oohs"
and "aahs" every time Nathan bent over
to pick-up a ball. If the coach didn't appreciate
the flesh in display, the mens 1st graders training
up the other end of the pitch certainly did!
Garry Welsman - Gazza had hundreds of people sleep
in his bed throughout the season, yet failed to
score even once.
Winner: The Sharkies
Bushpig
Nominations:
Nathan Gilbert - various social snogs and party
pashes, at numerous events, including a dominating
performance at one farewell party that springs
to mind.
Dave Gilbert - threw out the challenge to his
younger brother with a solid and repetitious performance
in Albury. Was also seen to dominate at that farewell
party.
Claire Larter - For the following conversation:
CL: "Who is he, anyway"
Reply: "He's the 1st grade goalkeeper"
CL: "Great, he'll do"
Carl Strautins - Tooney was in sensational form
at the recent University Games in Sydney, making
great use of the timber board-walk and gardens
outside Chinta Ria in Darling Harbour, the toilets
inside nightclubs, and any other dimly lit areas.
Was he led astray by a previous Bushpig winner?
What's the go with that, eh?
Matt Carson - wound back the clock with a passionate
display of pashing at the state Uni Games in Coffs
Harbour. His behaviour earned 2 young girls their
new nicknames of "entrée" and
"slops"
Winner: Tooney
Beerfish
Nominations:
Peter Marlin - The Fish had to be dragged from
underneath a toilet door after passing out at
Uni Games, Coffs Harbour. Does not remember getting
home, and still does not know how he woke up in
his own bed when he didn't have a key.
Virginia Peadon - 2nd grade 'keeper played every
game with a hangover, except for the finals -
should not have changed the night-before warm-up.
Bruce Sutton - if there is one thing more certain
than a Wallaby victory over the All Blacks, it's
the weekly sight of Bruiser, drinking jugs at
VC Bar, picking fights, getting kicked-out of
Jacksons (which is no mean feat) and stumbling
out of Burger King with half a Whopper smeared
across his face. Consistent and large performances
throughout the year.
Anita Cambridge - Wiped herself out at Cath's
21st, but recovered enough to fight on at VCs
later on in the evening, with head on a table
and eyes struggling to stay open.
James Telfer, Rob Pickering and Stuart Carruthers
- a group nomination for these old family guys,
who obviously don't get out that often, but when
they do, they do it in style. James even managed
to spill an entire beer over one of his 3rd graders
at the Beach party in May.
Winner: Bruiser.
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