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UTS Hockey Club 2004
Novelty Awards
First Aid Award - for the best
or most numerous injuries during the season (hotly
contested this year!)
Dave Gilbert
1. Broken hand in first half of second game of week long indoor state championships.
2. 3 stiches after ball to the face at start of the season.
3. Groin injury - requiring surgery - but kept playing
4. Surfing accident: severe lacerations to hand and foot, and unknown until going to hockey training a broken rib.
5.
groin injury - after surgery - slipping over when drunk and retearing the muscle.
Kermy never dive for the ball 1 week before your wedding. Would have been a very boring honeymoon!
Danielle Collin - Busted Knee pre season (stupid Indoor - 1st game!!), hospital till 3am getting face stitched, torn arse muscle, broken big toe
Duncan Terrett The last injury of the season, pulling a hammy and having to miss the finals.
Mo Akram Scored himself two injuries in a fortnight: one on each arm
Lexi Dengler broken foot in a friendly game the week before the finals
Sonny Pissweak Chadha must just be getting old hurt his knee after only a month of the season
Dean Walsh spectacularly broken finger
Jason Devo Selby played pretty much all of the games in Wollongong with broken bones in both hands
Pip Williams first injury of the season knee injury in the first round.
Winner: Dave Gilbert
Woosy Milk Skull Award - for lamest performance
or worst excuses during the season
Men's 3's and women's 2's both came last on the ladder with good teams.
Ellen Tsoi slept-in and missed a 5pm game
Claire Wilmott on holidays for half the season
Romeo Carinci getting more yellow cards than anyone else in the club
Mel McHutchison managing to get all the way to Wollongong with out a ball bag
Tooney - for waking up one Saturday morning and telling Playschool that he just didn't feel like playing today and going back to bed, and missing 3rd grade game.
Mel McHutchison deciding not to nominate team mates for Beerfish and Bushpig Awards, in case their parents found out.
Tooney Aus Uni Games, falling in love on the first night, turning off the Toon Engine' and turning on the Carl Charm'
Kermy injury ended his season, but Chris Flannery played a grand final within a week of suffering the same injury!
Winner: Ellen Tsoi
Dummy Spit Award - for the best or most numerous
dummy spits during the season
Gus getting ejected from Crowie
Solly when mens 2 nd grade ignored his corner selections
PK stick regularly reached dug-out before he did
Solly when umpires made bad calls
Razz trying to get his lazy, unfit fullback into position
Solly when someone didn't pass the ball early enough
Cato when playing a shocker
Scott McGlin Is Jez gonna do any f*cken' running this game?
Kermy I've just reached the lowest point of my hockey career ringing a mate in Perth whilst benched during a game.
Gerry Serrao consistently going above and beyond the call of duty
Burnsie bouncers are always such friendly people aren't they?
Selby giving management a piece of his mind in Wollongong , and then following it up with a lesson on good manners.
Anita - the mouse who constantly says she is too quiet to be able to call people into position from the back - screaming F*#k Off to opposition tackling her - very loudly and VERY high pitched
Julie Gosper final game vs Glebe, was involved in a bit of a tussle with one of the opposition, later in the game she chipped the ball at that player from a free hit, which hit her in the back, but Jules got the free as player was within 5.
Winner: Solly
Golden Spade Award - for consistency and hard
work in attempted sleazing during the year
Playschool pre-season training ' ..... all single girls this side..... those with partners that side...all the single girls come with me'
Coaching staff ... no more need to be said
Lisa Wilmott which is the right brother???
Tooney for his efforts to pick up the Maccas chick in Parkes on Good Friday. When we went back on Saturday morning for breakfast she was so surprised to see Tooney again she dropped a whole tray of hash browns.
Taya "Doe" Prescott Going out and wearing just a belt', in Perth
Gemma "Giggles" Hartmann - Caught the attention of traffic cones all over Perth .
Winner: Playskool
Bush Pig Award - for consistency and hard
work in sleazing during the year
Gab Nosworthy - only way to shut Gus up was to slip the tongue in.
Gus Newcastle , New Members Night, any opportunity was perfect to invade someone's personal space.
Poly Esther Honan picking up the coach
what is it about the Ryde comp and incest?
Tooney - for the girl that he brought back to the motel in Parkes. She was the motel owners daughter.
Jenna "Jemima" earned this nomination from incest in both Wollongong and Perth .
Tooney - Setting the standard with sleazing consistently on anything that moved at AUG; air hostesses (refusing his offer to join the mile high club), serenading plane passengers, bringing the girls waterpolo team to tribunal, sleazing on all and sundry at the hotel and even having a go for Turtle on the train and being fined with incest as a result.
Winner: Tooney
Beer Fish Award - for the consistent and/or
excessive consumption of alcohol during the year.
The Women's Metro 4 team dinner
The entire team showed up and consumed about 20 bottles of wine plus other drinks during the dinner. After being kicked out of Pino's they went up to the Crowie for the pub night, all pissed as nits. Refused entry at the main door, but their coach found a conveniently unlocked door not far from it. They all entered the crowie and the boys thought it was Christmas time. After a few more rounds of shots, Mele was unconscious (quite bad actually), Vic "Vommie" Clancy was redecorating the gaming room and Karina was speaking in three dimensions. The rest were all over the place and there were a lot of sore heads the next day (Mele's lasted for weeks), but having a great time as we do.
Mel "Bear" - Consistantly intoxicated, flirting and swearing (MF this, some MF that) during uni games, then an absolute huge night on the first pub night back leaving her unconscious in Barbs's car.
Danielle Collin - a certain $550 fine could have been the culprit - but it could also be the fact she was thrown out of the Crowie on every club night she attended - even the night she was driving!! (Bruiser is a liability though)
Kath Cookies Morgan went out for a big night in Wollongong
it turned messy.
Vic Clancy emptying more than her wallet in the pokie room
Jezza Leading from the front, especially at that same club pub night
Razz NSW Olympians dinner, sharing cab home with Andrew, winner from The Block , turning to him and saying You look really familiar, I think I've played hockey against you
Steve " Milo " Mileham - Hurls on 5 people in a nightclub, goes home, changes and is back in the nightclub in 25 minutes. Told cab driver someone else had spewed on him.
Razz John Key's Bucks Party, barred from entering the casino
Milo - Consistency at Australian University Games... going out on every one of the 10 nights on tour and throwing all ten of them up on the plane trip back to Sydney . His colour had striking resemblance to Kermit the Frog.
Winner: Milo
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